


Expectations vs. Reality

by Tashigi



Category: One Piece
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Attempt at Humor, Domestic Fluff, English, First Meetings, First Time, Fluff and Humor, Fluffy Ending, Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, One Shot, Other Ships Not Mentioned in Tags, Parent Dracule Mihawk, Protective Roronoa Zoro, Romance, Translation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-27
Updated: 2019-08-27
Packaged: 2020-09-27 23:45:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,953
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20416289
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tashigi/pseuds/Tashigi
Summary: Sanji had always been a romantic man and wanted to have a perfect relationship. But the reality was very different from his expectations...





	Expectations vs. Reality

**Author's Note:**

  * A translation of [Expectativas vs. Realidad](https://archiveofourown.org/works/20416158) by [Tashigi](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tashigi/pseuds/Tashigi). 

> Disclaimer: One Piece and its characters belongs to Eiichiro Oda.

Sanji had always been a romantic man and had high expectations about love, but the reality was very different from what he had imagined.

It all started the day he met an idiot with green hair...

**NICE TO MEET YOU**

Expectations:

In love movies, people always meet in a special and romantic way. For example, two strangers collide, they look into each other's eyes and instantly feel a magical connection, a magnetic attraction, butterflies in the stomach... This was how Sanji wanted to meet his future partner.

Reality:

One day, Sanji was walking through the park when he saw a group of beautiful women with miniskirts. He was dazed looking at their long legs and then _PUM!_ He collided with another guy who was doing footing.

— You bastard, look forward! - the man shouted. He had green hair.

— It's been your fault, dumbass! - Sanji replied.

— What did you said?! - the green-haired man got even more angry — It's been your fault, 'cause you were looking at that chick like a pervert!

— “Chick?” You can't call like that a lady you don't know, you stupid moss-hair!

— Oh, shut the fuck up, weird eyebrows!

They continued arguing and soon the words turned into punches and kicks. They made so much noise that a group of curious people formed around them, and then the police arrived and took them in their patrol car because of the scandal they were making.

They spent several hours at the police station, sitting face to face in a cell while looking into the other man's eyes. Sparks sprang from their eyes... And those sparks were definitely not signs of love.

When the police let them go, each one went his way grumbling. Sanji thought that he will never see him again, but...

— Wait! - the green-haired man called him.

— What the hell do you want now? - the cook replied.

— I'm Zoro. Roronoa Zoro. And you?

— Sanji – the blond said. He omitted his last name.

— Sanji... - the green-haired man repeated — You... Would you...? - He seemed to be a little nervous, even though he tried to keep calm — Do you wanna go for a drink, or something?

Sanji was amazed. What the fuck was that guy saying?! They had just met, they had fought for hours, how could him talk about going out together? Of course Sanji was going to say “No”... But instead...

— Let's go – was his answer.

**FIRST DATE**

Expectations:

After that day they met again many times and, slowly, love arose between them until they became boyfriends.

That night they were going to have their first official date as a couple and Sanji was really excited. He spent hours in front of the mirror, making sure his hair was perfect and choosing his best suit. He expected the green-haired man to take him to an elegant and sophisticated restaurant to have a romantic dinner.

Reality:

— One chicken burguer, big fries and a big soda too – Zoro said through the window of the McAuto — And you? What do you want? - he asked Sanji.

The blond had a nervous tic in his eye.

**MOVIE**

Expectations : 

Sanji loved romantic movies, especially if they are one of those that make you shed a few tears. He wanted to see a love film with his boyfriend, curled up on the couch under a soft blanket, with a cup of hot chocolate and some delicious snacks... And thrill together with the movie, looking into each other's eyes and crying as they sighed for a beautiful love story ...

Reality :

It had been hard for Sanji to convince Zoro to watch a romantic movie, but finally he agreed after a few threats. The blond had prepared everything to be like a perfect cinema: dark room, tasty popcorn and his favourite movie: Titanic.

Everything was great, but obviously the stupid marimo couldn't stop complaining.

— You told me it was about an accident... - he protested.

— Shut up and pay attention! – Sanji scolded him — Look what a cute scene!

— When does the ship sink? - Zoro asked bored.

— Shut up! - the cook repeated, throwing him a cushion.

They finally reached the most tearful scene. Sanji was crying, although he had seen the film dozens of times he always got sad in that part. He looked at Zoro to see his reaction and he was surprised to see that the no-feelings cactus was as serious as ever.

— Why the fuck aren't you crying?! - Sanji reproached him.

— 'Cause it's a silly death. Both fit on that, he could have saved himself...

— You don't understand stupid marimo, he has sacrificed himself to save her, his love is so pure that he gives his life for her, it's...

— But both fit on the board! - Zoro interrupted.

— Shut up and keep watching! There are still a few minutes...

The green-haired man snorted in resignation and didn't complain again for the remaining time.

— It hasn't been so bad, right? - Sanji said at the end of the movie while wiping his tears — You're very quiet, have you finally got sad?

A snore was the only answer he heard. That bastard had fallen asleep! Sanji was tempted to kick his moss head, but he didn't because he looked so adorable when he slept - of course, he would never tell him. The cook yawned, he was a little tired too. He settled down next to Zoro and let himself be overcome by sleep.

**THAT BODY **

Expectations :

Sanji was romantic but that doesn't mean he didn't care about his partner's physique. It was very important for him that his lover had an attractive appearance. When he imagined his future partner, he always thought... Well, he first thought it would be a woman. He had always loved women and still liked them, because he isn't gay, no, he isn't, no, no no no well maybe a little. Anyway, he had always imagined that his future partner would be a pretty girl, with long silky hair, soft porcelain skin, a perfect curvilinear figure, she would be a beautiful and delicate princess.

Reality:

Uh, who would say he was going to fall in love with a man? And that man wasn't a “beautiful and delicate prince” but the toughest guy that could exist. His body was nothing like a curvilinear figure, rather it was a square, with all those hard muscles like steel, those strong arms, those pectorals sculpted by the exercise, those defined abs and... Fuck, he was too hot. Ok, one point for the marimo!

**FIRST TIME**

Expectations:

Their first sexual encounter should be a special, romantic and unforgettable moment. Sanji imagined the perfect scenario: a large bed full of rose petals, candles, soft music... They would start with kisses and sweet caresses that would become more passionate, then they would slowly undress and finally make love looking into each other's eyes...

Reality:

One day, they went to the hospital to visit Kuina, Zoro's best friend, who was injured after an accident. They arrived at the hospital separately. Sanji was in Kuina's room with the other friends and family of the girl, and Zoro wasn't there yet. Sanji assumed that the idiot would have been lost so the blond went to look for him.

Sanji was right - Zoro was disoriented inside the hospital. He found him grumbling in an empty room.

— Stupid marimo, how can you always get lost?

— Leave me alone, sushi eyebrows!

— What did you call me, seaweed with legs?!

— What you've hear, stupid cook!

As expected, they started one of their typical fights. In a movement they ended up falling together on a hospital bed, and then, without knowing how or why, all their anger became passion. Everything was so fast and wild...

Just as they were about to climax, the door of the room opened and they were surprised by Dr. Trafalgar, two nurses, and old woman in a wheelchair and four internship students.

And that was their first time. It was special? A little. Romantic? Absolutely not! Unforgettable? OH YES.

**A ROMANTIC BATH**

Expectations:

One of Sanji's greatest fantasies was to take a romantic bath with his partner. Enjoy a hot and bubbly jacuzzi, sitting face to face, talking about life with a glass of red wine in hand, naked in body and soul... Some candles lighting the bathroom, sensual music... It would be so perfect...

Reality:

When they moved together, Sanji decided that he would finally fulfill his desire to take a romantic bath. He bought a bottle of the most expensive wine, lit candles, prepared the bathtub, in short he did everything possible to create a perfect scenario for love.

But, of course, things were not going to be as he wanted...

Their bathtub was too small and they were too tall, so it was impossible to sit face to face without putting one foot on the other's mouth. Zoro dropped the bottle of wine causing a great crash on the floor. But the worst part was that the idiot marimo also threw one of the candles, which made contact with all the spilled wine and caused a small fire. Luckily, they were able to extinguish it quickly, but the bathroom was smelling of burnt alcohol for three days.

After that, they obviously didn't try to take a “romantic bath” again. Besides, Zoro prefered fast freezing showers that he said helped him to acquire discipline and tone the muscles and strengthen the mind and all those bullshit. Anyway, at least they didn't spend much on hot water. And he left the bathroom free in less than five minutes. So... One more point for the marimo!

**PARENTS IN LAW**

Expectations:

Sanji was very excited to meet his political family, especially his future mother-in-law, whom he would obviously treat as a queen. He imagined her as a beautiful, kind and polite woman.

Reality:

He was finally going to meet his in-laws! They were already arriving at the house of Zoro's parents. They had met for dinner and Sanji felt a little nervous. 

— I hope to get along with your mother – the cook said.

— You don't have to worry about it – the green-haired man replied, knocking at the door.

— Why? Is it because you are sure that she'll like me?

— No, it's because I haven't mother.

— What?! Why didn't you tell me before?! - Sanji reproached him.

— I didn't think it would be important... - Zoro replied with a shrug — She died when I was a baby. Now my father lives with his new partner, they have been together for several years...

— Well, then I hope your stepmother likes me...

— Stepfather – he corrected.

— What...?! - Sanji couldn't say anything else because at that moment someone opened the door.

A man who had black hair and golden eyes appeared. He formally greeted them and introduced himself as Mihawk, Zoro's father. Sanji shook his hand politely. Then another man, who had a striking red hair, came running and welcomed them both with a hug.

— I was eager to meet Zoro's boyfriend! - the redhead said to Sanji while he ruffled his hair as if the blond was a child — I'm Shanks!

Zoro and his father spent the night talking about fencing and ignoring the rest. Sanji was surprised at how different his in-laws were: Mihawk was polite, serious and quiet, while Shanks...

— Come on, drink another one! - the cheerful redhead said filling Sanji's glass with beer while he drank directly from the bottle — You wanna hear another joke? - he ran his hand over his shoulders as if the blond was his best friend — A man walks into a bar and... No, it wasn't a bar but an airport... Or maybe it was a school? Uh, I don't remember, but it was a really funny joke! - he laughed loudly — Oops, the beer is over! I'm going for another! - he got up moving with difficulty because of how drunk he was.

Sanji sighed, resting for a few seconds from the presence of the crazy redhead. He looked at Zoro and Mihawk pleading for help, his eyes said “Save me!”. They shook their heads “Put up with him” they said quietly so Shanks wouldn't hear them. Sanji snorted – the night was going to be so long... 

**GO SHOPPING**

Expectations:

Sanji liked to look stylish and chic, so clothing was something important for him and he often went shopping. He always thought that his partner would be a person who shared his love for fashion and that they could have a great time shopping together.

Reality:

Zoro hated shopping, he wasn't interested in trends and always put on the first item he found in his closet. Besides, he always complained that it was desperate to go shopping with Sanji: the blond could literally spend hours hanging around the different stores and then load him with a thousand bags - or even leave without buying anything after spending all day at the mall. 

— Cook, let's go home, I'm gonna miss the match – Zoro grumbled.

— Mmm, which do you prefer? - the blond asked showing him a pair of shirts and completely ignoring his protests.

— They are the same!

— You are blind, aren't you? This one is electric blue and the other one is navy blue – Sanji explained pointing to both clothes.

— Both are blue, so it's the same! Besides, you already have a lot of shirts!

— I only have 30... Or 40... Mmm,  hold this, I'm gonna take a look at the pants over there – Sanji said putting a huge pile of clothes on Zoro's hands. He complained again. 

Sanji rolled his eyes. Shopping with the marimo was desperate: he complained constantly insisting to return home, didn't help at all to choose clothes, he always got lost in the aisles of the mall and even once fell asleep in one of the changing rooms.

— Why do I have to endure this? - both men muttered at the same time.

**COMFORT**

Expectations :

Sanji expected that his future partner would always have the right words to cheer him up when he was sad, a motivating speech, supportive phrases and sweet words to make him smile even in the worst days...

Reality :

The doctors had told them to prepare for the worst. Sanji's mother's disease had advanced very fast and was in terminal phase. She was 24 hours sedated on the bed, surrounded by tubes and devices that marked with a beep her weak vital signs. The doctors didn't know how much time she had exactly, but the final was imminent. 

When Sanji left the hospital room, Zoro was waiting for him in the aisle. He said nothing. Zoro could have lied to him promising that his mother would get better, or try to cheer him up with a silly comment like “don't be sad” but he said nothing.

Zoro simply put his arms around him and hugged him tightly while Sanji cried on his shoulder.

They were like that for a long time and Zoro did not say a word, but that hug comforted Sanji more than any words could have done.

**MARRY ME**

Expectations:

Zoro was a mess and Sanji complained a lot about him, but actually he was really happy with him. They argued all the time for any bullshit, but in the important moments Zoro had always supported him. Sanji wanted to be with him all his life and he looked forward to the moment when the green-haired man would said “marry me”. The cook dreamed of a very sweet and special marriage proposal, like a ring hidden in a giant bouquet of flowers, or a children's choir, or a banner hanging on a plane – or all together! 

Reality:

They had been dating for five years, three of them living together, but Zoro hadn't proposed marriage yet, he had never even mentioned it. The blond was beginning to get impatient, so he decided to give him a little push. 

— You know what day it's today?

Zoro looked up from the samurai movie he was watching on television and thought about the answer for a few seconds.

— Uh... Happy birthday? - he said with doubts.

— My birthday was last month – Sanji replied, a little vein was marked on his temple — But I'm not talking about that. You know? Today Robin-chan and Franky celebrate their first year of marriage.

— Good for them - Zoro said indifferently.

— And you know what? - Sanji sat next to him on the couch — Usopp has told me he thinks to ask Kaya to marry. It's great, isn't it?

— Yeah – he replied turning his attention to the film.

A new vein was marked on Sanji's forehead for feeling ignored.

— Luffy and Law also plan to get married soon, even though they have been together for less time than us – Sanji said with special emphasis on the last sentence.

— Sure Luffy wants to give a big banquet!

Sanji clicked his tongue. The marimo was a disaster when it came to capturing hints.

— How long have we been together? - the cook asked.

Zoro jumped a little at the question and counted sneakily with his fingers.

— Four years?

— Five years – the blond corrected him. He was definitely losing his patience — It's quite a while, so ... What do you think we should do now?

— Now? Well, it's almost dinner time, isn't it?

Sanji snorted. Why the hell had he fallen in love with such an idiot guy?!

— Listen to me – the cook said using all the patience he still had — We've together for five years. Several of our friends have already married or are going to do it soon. So, you and me... - he gestured with his hand inviting him to continue the sentence.

Both remained silent for a few seconds, looking into each other's eyes. Sanji's heart was pounding, thinking he would finally receive his long-awaited marriage proposal.

— I don't understand what you are trying to tell me – Zoro said, breaking the tense silence.

— MARRY ME, STUPID CACTUS!!!

Sanji covered his mouth with his hand as he realized what he had said. Shit, he wanted the marimo to take the first step!

Zoro was too surprised to respond with words, so he simply nodded affirmatively.

**ACCEPTANCE**

Expectations :

Sanji's relationship with his family was never good. When he confessed that he was bisexual everything got worst: his father kicked him out and his brothers stopped talking to him. Reuji was the only one who supported him. 

Some years had passed since that. During that time they had kept their distance, but Sanji decided that it was time to reconcile, so he invited them to his house to try to improve their relationship. Zoro would be late because he had to do some paperwork, but as soon as he returned Sanji would introduce him to his relatives.

Sanji spent the afternoon cooking a delicious dinner and rehearsed the words he would say to them a thousand times. He hoped they would finally accept him. When the doorbell rang, he took a deep breath to calm his nerves and came to meet them with the best of his smiles.

Reality:

Zoro hurried back home, partly because he had great news to give Sanji, partly because he wanted to meet his political family. Well, he actually didn't feel like it at all - from what the cook had told him, he was convinced that they would be a bunch of assholes. But Sanji was so excited about his possible reconciliation that Zoro was willing to strive to get along with them.

As he approached, he heard several shouts and could catch some of the words they said:

— ... And a disgusting pervert and...

— ... A shame for the family!

— ... I wish you were dead!

When Zoro opened the door he founds Sanji sitting in a chair with his head in his hands and his body trembling. His father and brothers were around him shouting all kinds of insults and hurtful comments. They turned their heads towards Zoro when he entered and instantly shut up when the green-haired man glared at them.

— Go away – Zoro said.

Sanji's father frowned.

— How dare you...?

— GET OUT OF OUR HOUSE! - Zoro shouted emphasizing each word and pointing towards the door.

Sanji's family left reluctantly as they continued to murmur some insults. When they left, the green-haired man closed the door and approached his partner, who was still sitting in the same position. Zoro knelt in front of him to be at his height, raised a hand and wiped away his tears.

— Thank you, Marimo... - Sanji whispered.

— You're welcome, cook – Zoro replied, giving him a kiss on the forehead.

— I thought... - the blond said between sobs — I thought that... They would finally accept me... I just wanted us to be a happy family...

— Don't cry for them – Zoro said — If they can't accept you as you are, they don't deserve to be in your life. But don't worry, you'll have a happy family with me – he showed him the papers he had under his arm.

Sanji's face immediately brightened with a smile. He kept crying, but this time his tears were of joy.

“_Adoption application: Approved” _

**FAMILY**

Expectations :

Sanji had always dreamed of having children and what he most wanted was to have a daughter, a cute little girl whom he would treat like a princess.

Reality :

The reality is that Sanji didn't have a daughter, but two! Two beautiful twins that Zoro and he had adopted. Their names were Perona and Bonney.

From the first time he held the girls in his arms, Sanji was taken by them. He loved his daughters more than anything in the world. He loved to play with them, buy them cute clothes, cook their favorite dishes and, in short, pamper them a lot.

But of course they weren't the perfect daughters he imagined. Actually they were good girls, but they were also too naughty. Zoro (although he loved them as much as Sanji) was always scolding them, and the blond always defended the girls – because how dare that stupid marimo scold his princesses?!

One day Sanji was busy in the kitchen when he realized something: there was no noise. That was very strange, the usual thing was that the little ones were making a fuss. He left the kitchen to see what they were doing.

He found them both at the sofa where Zoro was taking a nap.

— Bonney-chan, Perona-chan, what are you doing?

The girls were startled to be discovered. Sanji looked at one, then the other and finally at Zoro, and he had to contain his laughter. Bonney had painted his face while Perona had made some shorts pigtails in his hair. The man was sleeping so deeply that he didn't realize anything.

Sanji came a little closer, took the marker that Bonney had been using and drew a mustache on his husband's face.

— He lacked this. Now it's perfect! - he said making his daughters laugh.

— Don't miss the best part! – Perona exclaimed chuckling — Wake up dad!

The girls shook Zoro until he opened his eyes.

— What's up? - he murmured in a sleepy voice.

— You have to go to work! - Bonney said.

— Yes! Come on dad, you're late! - Perona urged him.

— What?! - Zoro exclaimed getting up quickly — Oh, I only have five minutes! — he said looking at his watch, whose time the girls had previously changed.

And without looking in the mirror or realizing his ridiculous appearance, he ran out into the street.

Sanji had remained serious throughout the scene, but as soon as the green-haired man left he laughed with his daughters.

— You have earned an extra piece of cake – he said hugging his girls, who smiled excitedly.

Sanji had always been a romantic man and had high expectations about love.

None of them came true, but he couldn't be more grateful for it, because real life with Zoro was much better than he had ever dreamed.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading :)   
English is not my first language so I apologize for possible mistakes.


End file.
